So now, as I hear in her voice the sound of a saddened spirit, I too feel sad. She is near the end of her life's journey. She remarked on this very recently. She said, "Look at how we are in such a different place in our lives, where you are now, and where I am." There was such a curious tone to her voice. It was like she had this genuine wonder at it all. My mom has always been able to say things, and to notice things or remark on life in such a way that it can stop my breath. I often end up pondering something she has said for a long time after.
It feels like we are learning to walk again, like when we were children. My mother is learning to walk again. My brother and I can only protect her so much. As she could only protect us so much. It seems that life will require this process from us over and over. We are still, and always, learning to walk. We are still, yet always learning to fall.